Boobs, Angelina Jolie, Young Japanese Girls

The Long Sunset received more hits than it has ever garnered with my last Palin post. And not just by a small margin, but literally nine times as many new hits as I’ve ever gotten before in a single post. At first I thought, finally, a little recognition for my political and societal ramblings. Then I realized, it was simply because I’d included the word vagina in my headline.

Sigh.

But I’d still like to thank the hoard of 35-year old Event Horizon fans who flooded my site hoping for pictures of Sarah Palin's worn out vagina. You’ve been a boon to my friend in the Teak Chair business (check the bottom of the page). So from now on my headlines will reflect what I think my target audience is searching for. And by that I mean, tricking people who are looking for porn into finding my site (I’ve already fallen for it 5 times).

Anyway, we have 15 days left. Unreal. This election season has seemed like some strange star that’s been in the northern sky your entire life. After one blood filled night it will be gone, and I’m not sure what I’ll do with myself.

I hope though, that the veins run with blue blood.

As the cold fronts finally arrive, the McCain campaign is trying every angle they have left. Last week was Obama The Terrorist week, this week is the Obama Voters are Un-American week, and next week I’m sure they’ll call Obama a Nazi-sympathizer. They’re running out of weeks. I’m waiting for the photo-shopped picture of Bam giving O.J. Simpson a reach around.

You know McCain has had one drawn up. He’s an unexceptional man.

But this is a symbolically critical election. And all elections at this point are more symbolism than anything else. Moreso in its own way, perhaps, than any election that has come before it in modern times. It’s a battle not only for reality, but for progress. Racial, political, ideological, and American progress. And if we lose here, it may be remembered as the day that sanity finally gave up.

Palin's Mean-Spirited Vagina

Maybe I was a little harsh on Senator John McCain in my last post. He is unexceptional, but he is also decent. I have to give him that.

Sarah Palin is awful. Just pure American awful. She’s what you’d get if you combined the meanest qualities of Richard Nixon with the dumbest qualities of someone viewing Extreme Makeover Home Edition. Her little bit about flying around in helicopters to shoot wolves really set me off. I’ve always said that hunting should be perfectly legally (as long as the species is in no danger), and I’ve always prefaced that with the fact that I think hunters are completely sociopathic. They’re a mean spirited god-awful crew of Ted Nugent’s that gets some strange pleasure from watching things die. Then again, I enjoy cheeseburgers. We are carnivores, and in all reality only vegetarians could honestly advocate the outlawing of hunting. Me, I enjoy cheeseburgers. They are delicious, and I know where they come from.

But flying around in a helicopter and blasting wolves isn’t hunting. It doesn’t involve the skill and hardship that comes with trekking out into the forest. It’s just mean and nasty. How would we feel if some superior brand of aliens buzzed through our neighborhoods every once in a while and blasted people? We’d think, those aliens are real assholes.

And that’s what Sarah Palin is. A real asshole. She’s just the Christian version of an extreme Islamist (whatever that even means anymore). If she’d been born in cave and taught to despise Israel she’d be the very people we’re claiming to fight right now. It’s just the nasty American version of religious insanity, and it’s disgusting. Not as insane, and not as dangerous (at least now), but not that far removed either. And I think the American people have had eight years of this type of righteous religious leadership and are sick of it. Or at least I hope so.

Because if Conservatives are right about one thing, it’s that we are in a culture war. And secular people (the %16 of us) better start recognizing it. The Right has been on the attack since about 1968. We better start recognizing that there are two ways to view the world. One believes in science, freedom, and the possibility of meaningless. And the other believes in text that is in all reality an impossibility. Whether it’s a Christian text, an Islamic text or a Scientologist text, makes no real difference. They all believe completely in something that is almost certainly not true. And they govern their lives by it.

It’s scary and beautiful at the same time. It’s easy. But if we are to progress as a species we have to face darkness. God is in physics.

Wait, what the hell was I writing about? Oh yeah, Sarah Palin’s black heart of darkness. It beats with hypocrisy and bullshit. So much so that even American Independents recognize it as a force of evil. So, so evil. And we need people running this country who recognize that the Earth is billions of years old.

What? Christ, that was that a disjointed essay. But I'm to full of Jagermiester to make more sense of it.

Rabble, Rabble, Rabble

I remember a time when calling Democrats terrorists was considered at least a little bit vogue. There was a certain dance involved; everything was at least somewhat veiled. Leading Conservatives just needed to hint that Democrats were everything from Communists to Gays to terrorists, and then let their network (literally and figuratively) do the rest of the work for them.

The McCain campaign’s just dropping that bullshit. They’re going to just to come out and call Obama a terrorist. Don’t like it? Think it’s a real dirty trick? Then stop being such a terrorist. It reeks of Rove. His stink lingers in the air.

And McCain really let me down with all of it. If there was one thing I’d always given him credit for, even if I disagreed with most everything he feels politically, it was that he wouldn’t sell his soul to become President. To be a Republican president in this age you have to give yourself over to the Hannity’s and the Religious Right. You’ve got to get down to good old fashioned hate-mongering. You’ve got to select you’re inner core not with who you think would be the most capable people, but with people who remind some dumb slob in Kansas of their cousin. You have to be willing to go against everything you’ve ever said, and perhaps, even what you feel is right. You have to hate gay people and blacks. And poor people.

I didn’t think John McCain had it in him. John McCain has it in him.

Can you blame him? Kissinger would not. Does anyone remember who ran against Woodrow Wilson? Will anyone remember John Kerry?

In an age when truth and reason have literally no meaning in the political season, he might as well bring out all the stops. No one will blame him. It’s often said that when you judge a man you must judge him within the context of the time in which he lived. And in a post-Nixon/Bush/Rove time, this campaign is what passes for legitimate American political dialogue.

But does a man deserve to be judged within the context of his age? Generally, I think it should be taken into consideration, as only an exceptional man can rise above the degradation of his generation. John McCain, over the past few months, has proven himself unexceptional.