The Hunt for Blue November

As if Hilary wasn’t giving Republicans enough to hate about her, now she’s portraying herself as the Mexican candidate. She marched a small stereotypical Mexican on-stage tonight in El Paso and harvested his soul for campaign power. It was disturbing to watch. And although I think most Democrats have caught on to the fact that Clinton is potentially very poisonous in a general election, I still think she’s going to get the nod. Because she’s smart. She’s collecting Super Delegates like Goro on an Easter egg-hunt, and she’s targeting the big states that she’ll probably win (especially Texas). I still consider Obama the underdog.

And I’m a little sick of the feminist we-told-ya-so thing that’s going on with Hilary struggling. One of the talking heads that was on CNN last night actually tried to make it sound like a women who finished first in her class at Harvard was doomed to be nothing but a legal secretary. Get real. Even a transsexual member of the Nazi party would be the head of Asian Distribution for 90% of the companies in this country by finishing number one at Harvard. This isn’t the 1950’s, women can do whatever the hell they want in any discipline, and to act differently is ridiculous.

On top of that, some are trying to relate the struggle of blacks in this country to that of white women. It’s not even on the same playing field. I don’t recall any mass murders of rich white women in the 20th century. And last time I checked, women have been in the upper echelon of Anglo-Saxon politics since before Queen Elizabeth. Certainly not in American politics, but there’s a big difference between being neglected and typecast as a gender and being actively hunted as a race. The Feminist left needs to stop saying there isn’t a difference just because they can.

People aren’t voting for Hilary Clinton because they don’t like her. It’s as simple as that. She’s as plastic and scripted of a politician as any we’ve ever had, and her voting record would make Paul Wellstone spin in his grave (to soon?). We all know that Obama has just as many Pharmaceutical companies and lobbyists playing puppet-master in his campaign as Hilary, but we give him a pass. He smokes cigarettes and plays soccer. His grandmother is a goat-farmer in Kenya, and in this Blow-Job to the White House that’s good enough for me.

Long Days, Long Nights, and Lots of Wolf Blitzer

All right, so two months ago I called McCain a reclusive old man who had as much of a chance of winning the presidency as Bob Barker. But times have changed. That's the problem with writing this stuff down as opposed to just blurting it out on television; it doesn't go anywhere. Alas, Giuliani may have had the most money, but campaigning in one state just wasn't going to work. I hope his campaign manager gets a raise and new job (he probably will too, this dipshit named Axelrod that Obama got conned into using as his CM has had more failed campaigns that Ralph Nadar).

At least I was right about Mitt the Mormon. Christians in the end just couldn't stand him, and they went for Huckabee even though he really doesn't stand a chance nationally. This will be a harsh lesson for the Christian Right, and I fear what the backlash will be in 2012 (although according to various sources, including a small Vietnamese lady that lives in Melbourne and the History Channel, the world's ending that year anyway). They're going to have to deal with a presidential election that features two candidates that don't hold the Bible central to their policies. Although, they'd probably be shocked to learn just how religious Hilary Clinton really is. Reading Clinton's My Life, it was astonishing just how religious even a Democratic president is.

But anyway, I see depressing signs of failure all over Obamas campaign, even if MSNBC isn't buying it. Clinton's winning huge with old women and whites, and Obama's scoring with college-aged students. Never a good sign. I remember realizing that Kerry was doomed in '04 when he seemed to focus on winning through the youth vote. You just have to get the old women on your side.

I was really hoping for a Huckabee/Obama race. Then at least America could decide: Crazy or Progressive. As it is, it looks like two extremely moderate candidates will be the parties nominees (did you know Hilary Clinton was the President of College Republican's at Wellesley?). Unfortunate, I guess that's why the poles are angry.

You already had your chance with McCain though, Republicans. He would have been a fine President for the post-9/11 years. I truly believe that, and although he's for fighting the Iraq war like Lawrence of Arabia, I don't actually think he would have gotten us into it in the first place. At the very least, he would have surrounded himself with competent people to help him make decisions. But you blew it. Especially you people in South Carolina who bought into the Bush smear campaign that McCain was harboring gay-Vietnamese/Mexicans in his basement. And you let the worst President in modern history take over.

So fuck you. The Democrats get a chance to have sex-scandals and policy failures. It's only fair. And it's not like the parties are all that different when you hang around the middle of them.

Ah, but it's all in good fun. American politics is like a Wal-Mart puzzle: the pieces seem completely opposite, and you can't see how they could come together, or if they're enough of them, but in the end there are and they do. And you're left with a boring-ass picture of a barn, a car, or some kitten.