State of Delay

There are spies everywhere. The final hours are grinding away towards the landmark decision to be made by Orlando's Appointed Deciders. People have gone mad with anticipation, and the summer heat has really brought this thing to a boil. I've said what I've needed to say. Now there are black helicopters circling my Orlando apartment by night, and ex-Soviet KGB madmen in the swamp behind my apartment in high camouflage. Oh, it's getting heavy in the center of the state. New stadiums don't come easy.

In other news, since when is a hot young redheaded star not allowed to do a few lines of blow and drive her car into a tree along Hollywood Boulevard? What's this world coming to? Isn't that a situation that police should have been resolved with a little cleavage and a few autographs?

And I have to add something about this after browsing a bit of Tom "The Hammer" Delay's new book (I consider this type of reading a form of helpful political self-torture. You know, good summer reading). It's amazing that we elect people who are this insane. Just amazing. Here's a direct quote from the book: "Liberals in congress have no ideas that history hasn't disproved, and this leaves them pursuing only power. To get that power, they will destroy you-and if they can't destroy your message they will try to lock up the messenger. Congress today is plagued by the politics of personal destruction."

I've italicized that last part because it almost made my head explode. This guy actually has the balls to say that after almost single-handedly leading the charge to destroy Bill Clinton for personal reasons. And hell, he pulled it off with a neat little impeachment. Delay is one of those in the God Put Me in Congress for a reason crowd, and it's scary to think that for a little under a decade he was about the 5th most powerful person in the world (and I may be underrating him there). And he consistently calls liberals communist's, which gives me a good chuckle.

Ah, Democracy...what a funny thing you are.